Tuesday, October 6, 2009

First Trimester- A challenge

Although I love being pregnant, the first trimester of pregnancy is always a little tricky. I'm always eager for those signs that show the world that something is really going on in there. Also, my personality is one where It's really easy for me to hold back emotion and I feel like I've been doing that this time around more than normal. Honestly I think I've heard story after story of pregnancy loss or newborn deaths and the reality of the fact that things don't always turn out the way that you want them to is staring me in the face. So I admit, I've been holding back a bit. That combined with a busy lifestyle and the unknowns of Malik have just left me feeling.....weird. I just keep moving and hoping that another week passes quickly. Another week to check off and get me on to the next. I know, however, that that's not how it's meant to be.

Even as I type this I am reminded of the scripture that says, "This is the day that the Lord has made, we should rejoice and be glad in it." It's probably one of the first verses that I memorized as a child because I can remember my dad saying it all the time. (Thanks Dad!) My challenge right now is to stay in each day, to be thankful for the nausea and other pregnancy unmentionables that are going on. They serve as reminders to me that today I am carrying a little miracle inside of me and what a gift that is.

Please pray along with me that I can celebrate each day and put the rest in God's hands.


Jill said...

Beth I SO relate to this. My pregnancy has been a HUGE challenge to me. I've never dealt with worry as much as I have with pregnancy and I have experienced those exact same emotions...just wanting to get through the weeks. A friend at work challenged me just last week to not let the enemy use the bad news I've heard around me to steal my joy of this gift the Lord has given me. And your verse also convicts me of the same. I will be praying for you and your little one. Thanks for sharing your heart.

MochaPrincess said...

You are so real! I had those same comments and feelings. God has a plan for you and your family and that is that. You are a blessing and that little person inside you is also a blessing. God will prevail and I will pray daily for you and your family. Be encourage and block out the "noise". Love you