Just as quickly as he came Malik left our home today. We had a feeling that it could happen this week but after a mix up of court dates, and a positive meeting with his advocate, we weren't sure that he would leave. In some ways we were thinking the courts would change the course of action and somehow choose to keep him with us. DFACS called me at around 11AM this morning and said that the judge had granted guardianship to Ms. Jackson (a friend of Malik's family). I was told to have all of his things packed by 1:30. That was it.
My immediate reaction was one of deep sadness. On a number of levels really. Although it's been a difficult 3 months saying good-bye to Malik closed a chapter, (at least for now), in our lives. I feel sad because our hearts had hoped that he would become our son. He had already begun to bond with our kids and with us. He learned how to eat, crawl, cruise and stand while he lived in our home. He started talking and using da-da and ma-ma when we were around. Although we would pass on his scream :-) his squeels of delight were a joy to us all. I will really miss seeing him and having him as a part of the Chadwicks.
As I type my eyes and heart are so very full right now. Maybe I'm hoping that this will help to heal this sore spot that his absence has left. We prayed for Malik as a family before he left. We prayed that God would not forget him and that some day he would be a son of God. Honestly we have no regrets. We had a dream and went for it. It didn't work out the way we planned but we have to trust that we obeyed God and we pray that He was honored by the past 3 months of our lives.
Please pray for our family and mostly for Malik. His mother is currently not complying with her requirements to obtain custody of him. As always kids are resilliant, but Ian and I are sad. I know the sadness will go away and time will ease the ache, but today we just miss him and we are putting to rest the idea that he would be a part of us forever. At some point in our lives we do hope to be on this journey again, but for now it seems wisest for us all to wait.